How to Have an Erotic Thanksgiving
With Thanksgiving just around the corner here in the States, and I want to invite you to make it an erotic experience.
"Wait!" you're saying, perhaps wondering if now's the time to close this window in your browser, "What in the world could she possibly be talking about?"
(If you aren’t in the US, or if you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving for whatever reason, it doesn’t matter … you can do all of what I’m going to lay out on any ordinary day of the week.)
Before you close this tab, slow down with me for a moment. By an erotic Thanksgiving, I don’t mean smearing yourself or your partner in cranberry sauce and gravy, or performing unsavory sexual acts with a turkey or an apple pie (however, if you're into unsavory acts with savory dishes, by all means get back to it).
This is much simpler than all of that.
Remember, erotic energy is not just sexual energy. We’ve relegated our eros and pleasure to what we do between the sheets, when in reality both are so much bigger than that. It’s this bigger thing, this life-force, creativity, sensuality, and generativity that I want you to engage this Thanksgiving.
People come to me lamenting that they can’t feel pleasure, can’t find their desire, they’re looking for it, desperately. And what kills me is that it’s actually right here, all the time. Within you and all around you. You don’t have to go out and find it, you just have to slow down enough to actually feel what’s already happening.
Here’s how you can do it THIS Thanksgiving.
As you eat your feast of a meal, take it in with all of your senses. Notice the sound the food makes as it lands on your plate, the clinking of serving spoons on dishes, the conversation happening all around you.
Check out the colors and textures with your eyes.
Smell. Oh! the smells of warm dressing and green bean casserole, fresh-baked bread and melting butter.
As you bring a forkful up to your mouth, pause before shoveling it in and really take it in. The smells and the sights.
As you place it on your tongue, feel the clink of the fork on your teeth and the texture of the metal on your tongue and lips as you slowly slide it out.
Pause again to feel the temperature, the texture, the flavors. Chew slowly, noticing all the changes that happen as everything mixes in your mouth, savoring and allowing all of your senses to participate in this moment, this one bite of your meal.
Feel the sensations of swallowing, the contraction, the pushing, the sliding into your body.
And repeat.
We tend to move so fast. Our senses are active all the time. All the time. There are things to smell, taste, hear, see, feel, and enjoy. All the time, but we miss most of it because we’re multitasking, distracted, or have never been invited to pay profound attention. Every moment is a sensual experience; whether or not you are tuned into it is a different matter.
This Thanksgiving, start practicing, even if it’s just a single bite. Especially if you are wanting more connection, pleasure, play, and depth in your life, pay attention to what’s actually happening.
And on Thursday, rather than focusing on all the things that are uncomfortable, painful, or going wrong – i.e., your inebriated, racist uncle, or your mother asking you for the 500th time this hour when you’re gonna finally find someone, settle down, and have kids – turn your attention toward your sensational experience, find something that feels good and pleasurable, and take a vacation into it. Even if it’s just for a few moments.
